Glasgow Crazy

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"Slainte mhoiz" means...Cheers!

Darling,

Europa! needed a break from her European travels of this summer, so as you can see, she has been relaxing and putting herself back together in Glasgow. Although it is a little off the beaten track of glamourous Europe, there is a lovely, free museum of art in the University, and a wide variety of places to shop, dine, and party.

But the thing that really makes Europa! wild about Glasgow...

...

...Oh, who is Europa! fooling, here? We must face facts, Glasgow is not a fun city. It is dull, so dull, inexpressibly dull. That is, unless a fight breaks out. If Europa! did not need a place to recover from her recent varicose vein injection therapy, she would not be here at all. (Yes, darling, Europa! knows you are shocked to think that someone as apparently flawless as Europa! would admit to such a thing, but after all, Europa! is a gadabout... Varicose veins are an occupational hazard.)

Darling, just look at this appalling architecture! Brown, stone-faced and forbidding buildings make the inhabitants feel small, powerless and locked out. Not at all charming, like say, Paris, whose architecture is grand, but which makes the citizen feel like a part of it all.

Europa! does not like social control.

Luckily, darling, the people of Glasgow are utterly charming and very friendly. Despite Scotland's reputation as the most violent country in Europe, the Glaswegians share Europa!'s taste for the finer things. So, this very industrial city has all the ingredients to become a completely civilized European centre, and it's well on it's way.


A large audience gathers for these buskers

Just avoid Bothwell Street at night. The insane freak-shows who pass for "ladies" there will set upon you for "not smiling". (Or for smiling, depending on their momentary, drug-induced whim.) Oh, and also avoid the local sausage and chips. The sausage is not hotplate grilled, but breaded and deep-fried. Greasy, thy name is pork.

Now, if only Europa! could understand a word the Glaswegians were saying...

Oh, yes, and Angus is much better, thank-you.

So, the travel season in Europe is winding up. Europa! needs to think of a romantic and exciting destination to show you... Ah, yes, Europa! knows the place. And in a couple of weeks, you will know, too!

Kisses, darling!

Ciao!
Europa!

Scottish "High" lands

Europa! laughs in her Glasgow hotel while what appears to be an alien craft hovers outside.

Greetings from Glasgow, darling,

But you are surely wondering what Europa is doing in the chilly city of Glasgow on this September day...

Well, darling, Europa! is visiting a sick auld acquaintance she could not bring herself to forget... It seems that Angus McScott has a touch of food poisoning. Europa! believes he got it from the haggis he single-handedly consumed at his best friend's weekend stag party, but Angus fiercely denies this. Between bouts of wooziness, he mutters something about risking deportation if he were ever to blame it on the haggis. Europa! thinks he may be delirious and will stay with him until the delusions clear.

But speaking of delusions, just look at that thing hovering over Europa! What fun! It looks like an alien space craft. It seems that even aliens can't get enough of Europa!'s charm and joie de vivre.

If aliens wish to be invited, why don't they just introduce themselves?

Well, darling, Europa! has to go. Besides ministering to Angus, she is looking for a Charles Rennie Mackintosh rose motif kilt pin, and they're so dear...

Ciao!
Europa! 8-D